AITA? Nah.

Being human is hard. We all fuck up at any given time in life and we are not in charge of policing one another - with that said, give space to others to share with you how they feel when you inevitably fuck up and give yourself grace as a human being.

If someone is speaking their truth and it involves you in a light that makes you feel insecure, that is yours to work through and not theirs.

Consent is another matter altogether, ideally, you would give a heads up to a person (especially if you use their name or likeness) if you’re going to mention them in a story that is tough for them - but again, it’s your truth and if you lead with a heart of pure intention and love, then you needn’t worry about how it lands for others as again, that is theirs to work through.

I have felt extremely torn about this recently as much of what I share now on social media, through my website, etc is me baring my authentic soul, I’ve been silent for 40 years trying to please everyone else with a fire burning inside me (not a good one.) When I do share stories, traumas, and updates, I’m sharing what I know to be true - I don’t expect these words to land the same for everyone but I’m trying to find my squad, my tribe that I can help move forward.

The most beautiful part of my posting is that it’s not only helping me to further heal and grow, but it’s also coming from a place in my heart and soul that has been buried by conditioning my entire life. I’m breaking free and encouraging others to do the same. It’s not about anyone else, and the reactions or responses are not mine to solve for - but I have grace and my listener is on.

For those that feel the other end of this scenario, if someone shares something publicly that may involve you, take a moment to see what is coming up for you…what is the trigger, where is it in your body, and why? Secondly, think about the person, do you know them and love them - do you know their heart, and their intentions? Lastly, after these 2 cues, if you’re still triggered then share with the person that you’re feeling reactive to their truth.

Try to handle the matter as 2 human beings that fuck up sometimes. Give space and grace. Please never be the silencer to someone who is trying to heal, grow, and to be authentic. Acknowledge your role in the situation, allow yourself grace and permission to feel your feelings, give gratitude for growth, and move forward.

Many things can be true at the same time e.g. you fucked up many years ago and not the same person you are today - that’s amazing! I’m proud of your growth, but they can both be true.

If after sharing truths, both sides, and there isn’t a go forward point then that’s ok too. Give gratitude for the time you had together and move on to your highest and best self.

Be human, lead with curiosity, and know that everyone fucks up from time to time - it’s all about how you and other humans handle the fuck up.