Shitflower.
My therapist called me a shitflower once. I stared at her a little confused, as I imagine many of us might, but she then asked, “how do flowers grow?”
Well, from the ground, the soil mostly…right and if you wanted to help it grow faster what would you add? Fertilizer, right? What is fertilizer…
Oh, I see ok so because there is shit all around me, and I’m the light, I’m the shitflower! Got it.
This may or may not land with you but the point is, how are you finding your goodness right now? Are you getting tossed and turned in the muck that is the world or do you stand ten toes down in your convictions allowing yourself to feel each point of turbulence but not letting it stay with you too long?
You get to feel your feels. As a matter of fact, not doing so is called bypassing. Either ignoring the outside world or shoving it down so that you can’t feel how your body or nervous system wants to respond. The key is to allow the feeling to come in, discern which energy center it hits, and then decide if it’s something that will help you to stand in your light, or if it’s something that you don’t have capacity to take on, and put it down.
The ask of us right now is to find the pathway toward our own unique okayness from moment to moment, and it’s not going to look the same nor be easy necessarily - but the effort and intention behind finding our okayness so that we can continue moving toward the existence we DO want is the ask.
Example - I have been known in the past to become completely succumbed to the outside world e.g. couch rotting and watching nothing but news and replays of the horrifying event(s) that have just occurred. This behavior has blocked me from feeling any real goodness or connection to the people/things in my life that deserve my attention and love, namely myself.
Again, feel your feels…feel how it feels in your body and in your nervous system when the waves of news keeps crashing in AND remember that you are a soul and a human - you get to decide how you navigate through the neverending crashing of information.
Think about it - if you’re stuck in place as these waves keep coming in, you won’t be able to stand in your light, which is the way change happens by any degree right? When you’re able to use your discernment as a soul being having a human experience, you get to be aware of what you want to be aware of while gauging your own capacity to hold the energetic light that reverberates across the cosmos.
It’s about being so good at understanding your own energy that no one and no thing dictates that, you have full agency over how you feel and how you move day to day.
Have you had your shitflower moment? The moment where you feel amazing while everything around you doesn’t? That’s my day today - it’s wild y’all - I feel the weight of the collective but I’m choosing to stand firm in my light, I’m holding the line, I’m creating the existence I do want.
If you need to succumb for a bit to feel your feels, do it! Then, get to a point that you can say to yourself, ok, “I love me, and I deserve to feel good” so that way you can create any degree of okayness in that very moment for yourself, and that’s “how” you begin to move the okayness for the world outside of you.
My advice is to not get stuck in victim mode e.g. “why do I have this when so many don’t”, etc. - you can hold empathy and compassion for the world while understanding that each person literally has their own blueprint in this life and yours has nothing to do with theirs. Allow more than one thing to be true at once.
You’ve got this, shitflower. Trust yourself and the unfolding…this is how you’ll be able to stay firm in October.
~Coach Amy